How I’m staying grounded during a tough housing transition
If you’ve been following me on my socials you will have seen that our ceiling collapsed last month.
For clarity, we live in an old cabin in the front range of the rocky mountains. It was the original home that my parents bought when they arrived in Colorado in 1996, grandfathered into the acre that they purchased. All six of us lived there somehow, all piled on top of each other. My parents, sisters, little brother, and me.
They eventually built a proper house next door as we got older. But that 700 square feet has always been a safe haven for our family. A rickety yet reliable roof and walls when we needed it.
For a few years it was headquarters for my parent’s granite business. Both of my sisters had spells living there. My dad grew weed there for a few seasons. My turn in the cabin came right around the pandemic. My lease in Denver was up, and I longed for a quiet respite from the city. I missed being close to my parents, fresh air, and the quiet. The cabin, in its mighty spirit, welcomed me home.
In the years since, I settled in more than I ever thought I would.
My now fiance moved in with me, (my first time living with a man!) We brought home our puppy Mando to that cabin. We remodeled the bathroom, celebrated 3 Christmases, hosted equinox/solstice gatherings and started our small farm of 12 chickens and a beehive.
The cabin is old, and it gave us so much in our 3 years of living there.
To make a very long story short, some rainwater got under the roofing fabric and compromised the integrity of the attic, which left all of the drywall in our home vulnerable to the rainstorm that came that same evening.
We came home to water all over our floors and a gaping, wet hole in the kitchen ceiling. What’s worse is that in the weeks following, we found a few patches of mold in the rafters.
These past weeks have been a lot for my family and I, to say the least. We’ve been bouncing around the spare bedrooms of family, wearing iterations of the same outfit, not eating our normal food, navigating the timeline of repairs, and trying to stay on schedule with work.
The truth is: the cabin is old, proper repairs are significant and extensive, and not something we can realistically accomplish before snow falls. (first dusting is due this week.) With a lot of other circumstances out of our hands, we decided to take a hint from the cabin. Let go, and allow things chapters to close.
It’s not lost on me that no one has ever lived in the cabin for more than 3 years at a time, so maybe my time was up. This is all happening on the heels of 7 planets in retrograde and just before eclipse season. We are being literally pushed into a new phase of life.
As a Cancer Sun, I am taking this one particularly hard. My home is my heart, my bliss, my safety, and my hearth. It’s where I rest, cook, recharge, and see many of my clients. Not to mention the spiritual significance of what it meant to live on the land I was raised on.
And while we are so blessed to be staying in a warm home with loving family for the next few months, I’m finding that I’m needing a lot of EXTRA care to stay grounded. Here are some of the practices that have kept me rooted and nourished amidst all of this emotional and physical transition.
#1- Sleep
I’m not gonna lie, I didn’t sleep much at all for the first week. We were back and forth between parent’s houses and the camping trailer some family friends lent us. I didn’t realize how dependent I was on my sleep routine until it was absolutely upended.
I’ve read so many studies on how sleep deprivation can change the way your brain fires, and I can firsthand attest to that. I was moody, slow, weepy, and really hungry. When you’re not sleeping enough, your hormones, such as the GLP-1 hormone, which controls feelings of fullness and satiation, can become offset. If your body can’t access sleep, it will try to access fat through prompting hunger for extra calories the next day.
Nervous system stress also puts an extra caloric demand on the body. So for the first week, my body was torching calories at a higher than normal rate. I needed more. More fat, more protein, and more sleep.
There were a few nights where stress and anxious thoughts kept me awake, so I developed my knockout cocktail for this specific reason. It has:
Chamomile tea
5-10mg liquid melatonin
1 dropper full of Motherwort, Lemon balm, and Oat straw (read on to learn why I chose these herbs.)
Magnesium fomulation + Ashwagandha
I don’t like to lean on sleep aids, but for this specific time of life, it has been a godsend in making sure I’m catching up on sleep debt and letting my body do cellular/ nervous system repair while I sleep.
#2-Tinctures & Flower essences
With my home apothecary boxed up, I haven’t had access to the regular and simple herbal formulations I’m used to. An herbal formulation doesn’t have to be a complicated remedy; a simple box of Sleepytime tea is considered a formulation!
My nightly cup of herbal tea was making its absence in my body LOUD. Between all the packing, pivoting, and quick moves, I had gone about a week without some of my grounding herbal allies.
I popped over to Natural Grocers and just let myself stand in front of their tincture wall. Just standing there I felt my heartbeat slow and my nerves relax. I love the subtleties of how our bodies can benefit from herbalism by just being in the presence of plant matter!
I allowed intuition to guide me, and reached for some of the tincture concentrates that felt soothing to the touch. I took home Motherwort, Lemon Balm, and Oat Seed (aka oat straw.)
Lemon balm grew in my garden all summer, and is a welcome tonic to my body. Oat Seed is in the Hops family, and has a miraculous silky starch that coats your nerves, supports brain fuction, and helps with regulating sleep.
Motherwort was the heavy hitter. Also known as Leonurus Cardiac, it is a masterful opener of the heart. Its alkaloids are clinically used for stress management, and its spiritual properties tend to the mother wound. It is a deeply supportive herb, which is why my bottle is almost gone <3
Flower Essences
Unlike tinctures, a flower essence is like capturing the essence of a plant's soul in a droplet of water and sunlight. It's a gentle, vibrational infusion derived from the energy imprint of flowers.
I have been working with a Wolfsbane essence by Banefolk, and it has transformed my emotional stamina. Wolfsbane is a bewitching beauty in the world of botanicals. Its vibrant blooms and potent properties speak of transformation and courage. It has subtly shifted my spirit towards newfound strength and boundaries that mirror the resilience of the wolf (an archetype I am deeply needing to call on in this time of unapologetic self preservation.)
The other essence I have been working with is Marigold flower. It’s sweet, bright, and is helping me maintain my own inner sweetness so stress doesn’t harden me.
I think flower essences are far more effective for emotional and spiritual healing. If you are also on a big journey of shift, change, resurrection, or manifestation, I highly recommend looking deeper into flower essences.
#3 -Morning pages + Therapy
I’ve heard all about the benefit of morning journaling, and specifically the illustrious “morning pages” exercise made famous by Julia Cameron’s The Artist’s Way.
I know that adding MORE things to your morning routine can start to feel cumbersome. And between you and me, I don’t write every morning.
But what I love about the morning pages specifically is the invitation to write without structure. The exercise is to set a timer and essentially “dump” your thoughts onto the page. It has helped me get out my frustration, guilt, self blame, and a lot of the other complex emotions that have come with this housing transition. I highly recommend it if you need to get some mental angst out.
I also can’t speak highly enough about therapy. I started with a new therapist in March of this year, and it has been absolutely life changing.
I’ve been in and out of therapy for a few years, but this is the first time I have committed to one for more than a few months. It has been a multi month repatterning of my brain, nervous system, and even my body.
I speak about this because I think it’s important to normalize receiving therapy, and mental health work being as non linear as it gets.
I pay for therapy out of pocket, and I think that’s also important to talk about because there are so many cost barriers to receiving care. I was just outside qualifying for government subsidized therapy, so I’ve had to really work my budget to be able to invest in my mental health.
But believe me, there’s no place I’d rather spend that cash.
#4- Warm, cooked breakfasts
If you know me/ have been tuning into my socials at all this year, I KNOW I sound like a broken record. But here’s the truth!
YOU MUST EAT BREAKFAST. Especially as a woman in your reproductive years. Your hormonal health hangs in the balance of a specific protein threshold and easily digestable foods, aka warm cooked foods.
The research indicates that most women need around 30 grams of protein in the morning to sustain muscle synthesis and hormone balance.
To boot, making sure that you’re giving your body warm, cooked foods in the morning can stabilize your overall blood sugar levels and mood throughout the day.
I’ve felt pretty fried these past 3 weeks, but you know that I’m having at least 4 eggs in the morning + some organic sourdough toast and fresh avocado. That alone sets me and my body up to feel grounded, regardless of what the day holds.
#5-Slow, steady exercise
I adopted weightlifting during pandemic, and it has become a beloved staple in my workout routine. Resistance training is incredible for women’s metabolic health. It can also minimize inflammation and reverse chronic health issues like pre-diabetes and insulin resistance.
Getting myself to the gym at this time has been crucial, and I’ve really eased up on my expectations of myself once I get there.
If I’m mentally exhausted (which I have been,) I don’t push to lift as heavy as I normally would like. But I do get some weights, and I do the bare minimum reps to drop into my breath and gather my scattered mind (that’s usually about 15-20 reps.)
I let myself move slow and intentionally. I take my time.
I’ve also reframed my mind around how I see working out. Rather than an avenue towards “weight loss” or “sculpting,” I see it as a time investment in my stability. In my overall strength. Strength of body, spirit, and character.
All the research is there too- regular exercise is vital for neurological and mental health, and CAN help you sleep deeper at night (see point #1 on my list!)
Even if I arrive at the gym feeling deflated, I never leave feeling that way. The reinforcement in my spirit and confidence is always worth it.
Life is always shifting, and I know that this weird interim period of transitioning into a temporary home won’t last forever. I know that I won’t lean on all of these grounding practices forever, but they are giving me the grounding that I need while the lessons of this period reveal themselves to me.
I hope some of them work for you too :)
-Morgan
